I’ve always been weirdly vain.
Many people associate vanity with snootiness and a general sense of egocentrism. While you’d think those things would necessarily go hand-in-hand, I am living proof that it’s just not so. I don’t think I’m terrifically attractive. I know my sense of “reasonable level of grooming” is shameful, at best. I’m no model, no camgirl, no flirt, no fashionista, no beauty queen. Honestly, I sometimes feel like the gross kid in class.
But my God, do I love looking at myself.
Maybe it’s inherent within everyone, but I find it sort of glaring in my own life. If there’s a shiny surface nearby, I’ll have a peek at my reflection. If there’s a camera around, I want to be in front of it and I get antsy until I see the photos. I have no starry eyed aspirations of being stunning and adored. I just like to look at myself.
And if you think about it, it’s kind of fun, right? Have you ever just hooked up your webcam and watched yourself. Once you’re done toying with the crazy settings (I AM A RAINBOW) you’ll be amazed at how different your face itself looks by simply turning your head slightly. A couple degrees of rotation takes my nose from crooked to straight, a little tilt makes my eyes look doey, a bitty pinch of face muscles changes my expression altogether. It’s amazing. And of course it’s fun to take almost attractive photos and follow them up with “omg wut.”